Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Still Thinking...

We had a memorial of sorts for our friend today... We gathered at the school and just had a time of sharing what our friend meant to us... Al the way from the people who barely knew her.. to the last person she emailed Friday afternoon before this tragedy occurred.

Understandably.. that person is shook up.. she blames herself for not getting the email in time.. she questions herself.. what could she have done if she had.. and the thing is.. she might have talked her down and out of it this time.. but that would have been only this time.. I believe we all have a destiny...

The most amazing thing I heard and learned today was... the things in life that happen.. the things that literally break our hearts.. and sometimes our spirits.. are the very things that make us able to share with others..

"If I had never been broken, I wouldn't be able to share the pieces."

And that, my friends.. is, to me, an amazing statement.

The things that make us weak.. are the things we can share so others can be strong.. The things that hurt us and cut us to the bone.... are the very things we can share so that others might not hurt in the same way.. The overwhelming joys that we have.. are the things we can share when someone is cut to the bone hurting. The pieces of us.. that we give away to those we love.. would not be possible.. if we, ourselves, had not been broken.

As we left today, we had balloons.. on which we wrote our messages.. and as one.. we released them into the Texas wind.. I would like to say they went west to New Mexico.. where her final resting place will be in the mountains..

I am not totally sure I left that place today feeling any better. My mind is jumbled.. from that and some other things... I don't know where I am headed right now.. I do know that I did not leave feeling any worse.. The love in that room that was shared.. was powerful and very moving.. our little "family" has been hurt.. and we will heal with each other...



Dorrie.. May you find the peace that has eluded you... the physical pain and the mental anguish that has plagued you for so many years.. is gone.. and you can do all those things you said you wanted to do now...

Dorrie Spears
If you have the ability.. the means.. or the desire.. Please help us in making her legacy of helping others continue.. there is an address to donate to a scholarship fund in her name.. Much thanks..

4 comments:

SassyFemme said...

No words, just that you're in my thoughts.

Stacy Spears said...

Thank you so much for your kind words about Dorrie. You will never understand how bittersweet it is for her family to read these. It has provided comfort to Dorrie's husband, sister and son. I plan to bring this with us to NM to share with her mother.

Stacy Spears
Dorrie's daughter-in-law

Stacy Spears said...

Thank you so much for your kind words about Dorrie. Both Dorrie's sister and husband have read them and I know they received comfort from it. I plan to print this and bring it to her mother in NM this weekend. Your words are very bittersweet for us. Thank you.

Stacy Spears
Dorrie's daughter-in-law

Bammy said...

Stacy
I am glad this helped your family.. It helped me to write it.. but thats how I do things.. I have a couple other things I would like to mail to you if it is ok...